Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
