Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize
