Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
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