some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
this will be a night to untag.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize