Nicole vs. Life
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
We just shotgunned beers for America
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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