It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Randomize
