Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
