Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
