So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
