Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
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