We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
i think i just lost a toe
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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