There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
