I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I want to fling myself into the sun
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
