We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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