I just cut my nipple shaving
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize