what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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