She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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