U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
