He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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