spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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