We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
