Ambien. No doubt about it.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Randomize
