You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
