The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
is it fun? or sober?
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