I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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