Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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