so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
