youre lurking in front of me
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
