That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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