I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize