is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
