Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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