were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
