its not stalking. its research.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Randomize
