OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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