At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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