found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
