apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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