Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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