just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize