I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
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