Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
