sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
