so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
you made out with another girl for some wings
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize