Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
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