in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Randomize