My brain says no but my pants say off.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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