I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize