what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
But I just had this pork p�t�. It was dick grabbing.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
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