come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I intend to get homeless drunk
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize
