the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I'm getting married
To pizza
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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